Sunday, February 10, 2013

Live Tweeting a First Date - Girl Edition

This is Ashley. Ashley is live tweeting her first date.


6:00 pm: Can’t wait for date. #SoExcited
6:30 pm: I started the date like this. #NuffSaid
From: JustJared.com

7:04 pm: He just rolled up. #IsThatAMinivan

7:17 pm: He met my parents. #MomHatesHim #DadHatesHim #DogTriedToBiteHim

7:18 pm: Off to a good start.
   
7:43 pm: Want cheeseburger at restaurant. Got salad. #Don’tWantSalad
   
7:47 pm: He asked me how my food was, I told him it was fine. #IStillHateSalad
   
8:14 pm: Just walked into theater, he didn’t even ask if I wanted anything. #IWantMyEffingPopcorn
   
8:21 pm: Watching Die Hard. Can’t stop reloading my newsfeed.
   
8:32 pm: Bitch just told me to put my phone away. #Inconsiderate

8:43 pm: Bitch said she’s going to kill me if I don’t put phone away. Bye lovelies!<3:)

10:16 pm: I’m baaaaaaaaaaaaccccccccccccckkkkkkkkkk!!!!!!!

10:29 pm: It’s been real, but honestly, he’s not getting my golden ticket.

11:00 pm: But OMG. Best Date Everrrrrrrrrrrrrr!!!!!

2 comments:

  1. due to the alarmingly increasing rate of incredibly stupid and incredibly entitled underage sluts that exist in the world today i think the following twitter feed, consisting of some real tweets which can be found here: http://tweetingtoohard.com/ I must say an average girls twitter feed would look more like the following:

    5:00PM: Fucked up the Benz today! 2nd car in a month! Its ok tho hot date tonight! ;) #woops#YOLO

    6:50PM: I make multi-million $ decisions with daddies money on a regular basis -- why is it soooo difficult to decide what to do with my hair?

    7:30PM OMG… that’s not a Ferrari he is picking me up in…#rapevan

    7:34 pm: He met my parents. #MomHatesHim #DadHatesHim #DogTriedToBiteHim

    7:45PM: Ordered cheeseburger; I'm sedentary and eat mostly cereal, yet my abs look like I do sit-ups 3 hours a day. WTF? Viking genes never cease to amaze me. #winning
    8:00PM Not sure what he is saying…but he is hotttt!#giggles
    8:15PM i'm bored because i don't care about politics in third world countries. Life consists of #gossipgirl and #desperatehousewives#duh!
    8:45PM Going to the movies? #iwantotparty#whendoesthefunstart
    9:00PMpm: Just walked into theater, he didn’t even ask if I wanted anything. #IWantMyEffingPopcorn

    9:15PM: He snuck in some booze #luvvodka#drinkingrulz#wasted

    9:21 pm: Watching Die Hard. Can’t stop reloading my newsfeed.

    9:32 pm: Bitch just told me to put my phone away. #Inconsiderate

    9:43 pm: Bitch said she’s going to kill me if I don’t put phone away. Bye lovelies!<3:)

    12:16 am: I’m baaaaaaaaaaaaccccccccccccckkkkkkkkkk!!!!!!!Missed my lovelies!!
    1:08AM: I am a cheerleader. This adds to the impossibly long list of reasons why I am cuter than a dangling kitten. Yes, I have the skirt. He forsure wants me tonight # cuterthanakitten#imhott
    1:13AM: That awkward moment when ur in the backseat and…he wants to cuddle??? #soo weird#awkward#WTF
    3:00AM: Why didn’t he want sex? He must be gay. I’m fuckable. Retweet @jailbait hottie if you want me!

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